I'm not trying to condone what I did, but I just want you to know that I'm different now. God, I was so young and arrogant. I thought that every girl would want to get with me. I know that my apology isn't worth much now, but for what it is worth, I've felt guilty for it every day since."Heidi found that hard to believe. "Why now? Why did it take you four years to come say something to me?" She tried hard to keep her voice calm, not wanting him to know how much this conversation was affecting her."I tried to before. I've written you letters that I've never sent. I've come as far as your front door, but never had the courage to knock."Heidi stared over at him. He was so perfect. She remembered when she used to hate him for being perfect, for having the perfect life. She had resented him and everyone like him. In a way she still did.She wanted to punish him, to tell him how much she hated him still, but what was the point? It wouldn't make her feel better, not in the long run."I. But she was still a woman, and to be seen surrounded by children would only reinforce the latter perception.With regret and ever-lingering frustration at the assumptions burdening her gender, she conceded that they were right. Instead she took to the deepening twilight, visiting as many refugees as she could, helping to place the most vulnerable — frightened children whose parents were either off to war or missing altogether — with adults willing to take them in. It was emotionally exhausting, and physical fatigue was taking its own toll, but she had just one more stop to make before her rest. She’d left it for last, hoping to end a long and depressing day on a more personal note.Resolute, she pulled back the tent flap. And gasped.Elfi reared up in shock.The tiny shelter was barely large enough for its two tangles of bedding and a few jealously-guarded items. Éowyn had to duck and crouch to enter, and at full extension Elfi herself nearly touched two of the tent’s opposing walls..
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